Monday, January 30, 2012
How did that even get there?
Today I managed to get ranch in my hair. Too bad it wasn't until after I greeted a group of customers that I realized it.
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Saturday, January 28, 2012
Suck it
Today a woman ordered a fountain drink. Shortly after I brought it to her, she waved me over and complained that her Pepsi "wasn't strong enough." I presumed she meant that the syrup to soda ratio was not to her liking, so I offered to "remake" it for her. However, like most restaurants, our fountain drinks come out of the soda fountain, meaning they are pre-mixed, and cannot be especially tailored to a customers syrup dilution preferences. I took her old Pepsi into the kitchen, dumped it into a different glass, and brought it to her.
"Ahhhhh," she exclaimed after taking a sip. "SO much better."
"Ahhhhh," she exclaimed after taking a sip. "SO much better."
Friday, January 27, 2012
High Speed Chase
Tonight I had to sprint after TWO different customers that accidentally left their "to-go" boxes on their tables. My job is to serve you your food, not to run across the icy parking lot like a lunatic chasing after you with it.
Thursday, January 26, 2012
How things change.
THEN:
As a child, I loved when the wait staff sang for birthdays.
I felt so special being the birthday girl.
NOW:
As a waitress, I contemplate suicide when the wait staff sings for birthdays.
I feel like punching the birthday girl.
Sunday, January 22, 2012
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Well now you do.
Me: Can I start you off with a margarita tonight? Or we also have Sam Adams, Miller Light-
Customer: What- do I look like an alcoholic or something?
Me: Haha, no, those are just our promotions! We also have Pepsi products and ice tea.
Customer: I'll have a double shot of Makers Mark then.
Friday, January 20, 2012
Sketchers
Tonight marked day two of training at the new job. So far, so good...except for the uniform. I have no problem with the name badge or giant red promotional button I have to pin on my shirt every day. And in addition to being functional, the apron is even kind of cute.
The required shoes, however, are not.
Half of my first pay check will go towards shoes. Typical girl move, right? Wrong. I am not spending my hard-earned money on fun flats or sexy heels, but instead, Sketchers. Slip-resistant, fugly Sketchers.
Not only have I not purchased Sketchers since I was twelve, but these particular Sketchers cost me SIXTY DOLLARS. Sixty dollars! You know what I could have bought with sixty dollars? A pair of non-Sketchers shoes that don't look like they belong to a fifth grade boy.
The required shoes, however, are not.
Half of my first pay check will go towards shoes. Typical girl move, right? Wrong. I am not spending my hard-earned money on fun flats or sexy heels, but instead, Sketchers. Slip-resistant, fugly Sketchers.
Not only have I not purchased Sketchers since I was twelve, but these particular Sketchers cost me SIXTY DOLLARS. Sixty dollars! You know what I could have bought with sixty dollars? A pair of non-Sketchers shoes that don't look like they belong to a fifth grade boy.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
Whole new meaning to chili fries
Me: And what would you like as your side with that?
Customer: Fries. Hot fries.
Me: As in spicy? Orrr...
Customer: No, just hot. I don't want them cold.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Background Research
Orientation for my new job starts tomorrow, and I am determined to be the best dang waitress this place has ever seen. My past four years of classes have taught me that the key to success is being prepared. My past four years of classes through the school of journalism have taught me that being prepared includes background research.
If you google "waitress," your first two hits describe the 2007 film, "Waitress," starring Keri Russel.
IMDB posted a brief plot summary of the film:
"Jenna is a pregnant, unhappily married waitress in the deep south. She meets a newcomer to her town and falls into an unlikely relationship as a last attempt at happiness."
Damn. I thought my life was lousy. While I'm (fortunately) not pregnant or unhappily married, I am a waitress, so I suppose I can relate. Will I meet a newcomer in my town and fall into an unlikely relationship? Unlikely. Is this my last attempt at (job-related) happiness? Yes. I suppose it is.
The next hit on googling "waitress" came up with Wikipedia's page on "Waiting staff." Jackpot. This is the kind of research I went to college for- true investigative journalism.
Bold indicates what is on Wikipedia. Italic indicates my thoughts about it.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Waiting staff, wait staff, or waitstaff are those who work at a restaurant or a bar attending customers — supplying them with food and drink as requested. Got it. Traditionally, a male waiting tables is called a "waiter" and a female a "waitress" with the gender-neutral version being a "server." Sounds good. Other gender-neutral versions include using "waiter" indiscriminately for males and females, "waitperson", or the little-used Americanism "waitron", which was coined in the 1980s. Waitron? Wtf.
Waiting on tables is (along with nursing and teaching) part of the service sector, and among the most common occupations in the United States. At least nursing and teaching require a degree... The Bureau of Labor Statistics estimates that, as of May 2008, there were over 2.2 million persons employed as servers in the U.S.
(actual photo on Wikipedia's "Waiting staff" page)
Many servers are required by their employers to wear a uniform. I hope mine doesn't look like that.
On second thought, I kinda hope it does...
The duties of waiting staff include preparing tables for a meal, taking customers' orders, serving drinks and food, and cleaning up before, after and during servings in a restaurant. Silver service staff are specially trained to serve at banquets or high-end restaurants. I work at a bar and grill... They follow specific rules of service and it is a skilled job. Apparently mine is the unskilled kind. They generally wear black and white with a long, white apron.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bikini barista? I followed Wikipedia's second "See also" link for further research. Results, while interesting, proved unhelpful. However, it did introduce me to a whole new industry I was unaware of. It's good to keep my options open- just in case this waitressing gig doesn't work out.
Because both the movie plot summary and Wikipedia article were such insightful and reliable sources, I decided I had satisfied my journalistic thirst for the truth.
My professors would be proud.
And so will my new shift manager.
If you google "waitress," your first two hits describe the 2007 film, "Waitress," starring Keri Russel.
IMDB posted a brief plot summary of the film:
"Jenna is a pregnant, unhappily married waitress in the deep south. She meets a newcomer to her town and falls into an unlikely relationship as a last attempt at happiness."
Damn. I thought my life was lousy. While I'm (fortunately) not pregnant or unhappily married, I am a waitress, so I suppose I can relate. Will I meet a newcomer in my town and fall into an unlikely relationship? Unlikely. Is this my last attempt at (job-related) happiness? Yes. I suppose it is.
The next hit on googling "waitress" came up with Wikipedia's page on "Waiting staff." Jackpot. This is the kind of research I went to college for- true investigative journalism.
Bold indicates what is on Wikipedia. Italic indicates my thoughts about it.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Waiting staff
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
Waiting staff, wait staff, or waitstaff are those who work at a restaurant or a bar attending customers — supplying them with food and drink as requested. Got it. Traditionally, a male waiting tables is called a "waiter" and a female a "waitress" with the gender-neutral version being a "server." Sounds good. Other gender-neutral versions include using "waiter" indiscriminately for males and females, "waitperson", or the little-used Americanism "waitron", which was coined in the 1980s. Waitron? Wtf.
Waiting on tables is (along with nursing and teaching) part of the service sector, and among the most common occupations in the United States. At least nursing and teaching require a degree... The Bureau of Labor Statistics estimates that, as of May 2008, there were over 2.2 million persons employed as servers in the U.S.
(actual photo on Wikipedia's "Waiting staff" page)
Many servers are required by their employers to wear a uniform. I hope mine doesn't look like that.
On second thought, I kinda hope it does...
The duties of waiting staff include preparing tables for a meal, taking customers' orders, serving drinks and food, and cleaning up before, after and during servings in a restaurant. Silver service staff are specially trained to serve at banquets or high-end restaurants. I work at a bar and grill... They follow specific rules of service and it is a skilled job. Apparently mine is the unskilled kind. They generally wear black and white with a long, white apron.
See also
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Bikini barista? I followed Wikipedia's second "See also" link for further research. Results, while interesting, proved unhelpful. However, it did introduce me to a whole new industry I was unaware of. It's good to keep my options open- just in case this waitressing gig doesn't work out.
Because both the movie plot summary and Wikipedia article were such insightful and reliable sources, I decided I had satisfied my journalistic thirst for the truth.
My professors would be proud.
And so will my new shift manager.
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